stupid questions

So my husband just asked me, "who are the 3 dorks? " He said he was confused as to which ones were the dorks in the photos from last weeks entry . I didn't answer him.
My students at my school will graduate with honors for asking stupid questions. When I ask them to sign their names for their text books or to give them their detention papers, they ask "do I write it in cursive, or just write it?" I just stare at them and tell them to do what ever they need to do to get their name on the paper. You see, I've learned not to answer dumb questions. When I did answer them and when I explained that a signature is their legal marking (cursive) it took them so long to form the letters I would start twitching with anxious impatience.
I gave a test the other day in class and my rules are no talking during the test, so as soon as the tests are out, the silence begins. I have several students who then make a heavily weighed decision to whisper amongst themselves. When I take their test, they ask "we can't whisper?" I just stare at them. Usually other students yell at them and tell them that there's no talking; but this usually this leads into a hot arguement between the students about the differences between whispering and talking. I again choose silence.
At one point I though that stupid questions were entertaining. Now they are the blight that stains my brain. I am now 100% sure that stupid questions exist because their is brain blockage and no rational thought can penetrate this blockage of stupidity.
One student, synonymous with stupid questions was working in class and asked "do we have to finish this class work?" I actually answered him and said, "actually no!" He was elated. He didn't finish his class work, he sat there and played. When I gave him the zero he earned he was really upset. When he asked why he got a zero I told him because he didn't finish his work. He was ready for this response though, "but you said I didn't have to". And I retorted," infact you don't have to finish it, but if you want a passing grade you do have to turn it in. Since you didn't finish your work you got a zero. You don't have to finish any work I give you, and I don't have to give you a grade for it either. It all balances out in the end."
The student walked away confused and frustrated, not even learning the valuable lesson in responsibility. Next time I won't answer the stupid question. It'll be safer that way.
If you ask dumb questions raise your hand.
Put your hand down!